Bank Heist
by Talon3
Summary: Some of the Friends need money.


Not oolong ago I watched a movie called Quick Change with Bill Murray and Randy Quiad. IT was so good that I thought that I would combine the idea with the cast of Friends. Or Joey, Chandler and Monica. The others will be in it as well. But it is mainly focusing on Chandler, Monica and Joey.  
  
To start off with, it is 7th season. So everyone knows about Chandler and Monica and they live together. Now the thing is that Chandler got the guts to tell what he thought of Doug to his face and got fired. He can not find a job, so the ONLY one that is bringing money home is Monica, while Chandler looks for a job. Joey is still a struggling actor, but he is finding it hard finding a good acting job. He fooled around with Estelle's niece and left her in tears, not knowing who she was related to. So Estelle managed to have him blackballed all around town. Which did not help out his career at all.  
  
Ross and Rachel are back to dating and doing very well in their relationship and with their jobs. Ross, is the youngest professor of his subject at the college but they all love him, Elizabeth did not happen. Phoebe was hired at one of the aroma therapy shops to do massages. And they are all doing well with their current careers and in their love life.  
  
Jack and Judy love it that Ross and Rachel are doing so well together, they both hate Chandler, the unemployed Thanksgiving hating boy, even though Ross told him that it was him that was smoking pot. They think Monica is a failure for her job and her choice of boyfriends which they believe will not last.  
  
Now on with the story……  
  
*************************  
  
Chandler was cooking diner, he had learned to three months ago so that Monica would not have to worry, that kept the other friends except Joey out of the apartment, willing to eat anything but his torrid food. But he was learning and very well from what Joey and Monica told him. Well, it was just meatloaf and Mac and cheese.   
  
A quick a and easy meal that was not that expensive. They had to really cut down on everything they did spend their money on. They cut off their cable, no longer made long distant telephone calls. And the like. So that they only had to pay the basics. But that was still a chore. Monica worked full time at the restaurant and he got unemployment but that was getting ready to run out.   
  
He did try and look for a job, it was that there were none to be found. He would end up having to go and wait tables or something. Monica said that they needed a new a waiter at the restaurant , and it looked as though he had little choice. He could also see about going back to college. But that would take money, and they did not have any right then.  
  
Joey was also going through the exact same thing, he no longer was able to get a job acting so he worked in Central Perk as a waiter. HE also had to be very careful about his bills.  
  
Chandler sighed, Monica was not going to like what he had to tell her. HE just hoped that she was in a good mood tonight.  
  
The door swung opened and Monica stomped in. So much for the good mood. "I hate my job! Those creeps emptied an ash tray in the food and it was going to a food critic!" She sighed as she sat down.  
  
Chandler moaned, this would not be pretty. He sat beside her,. "Mon, honey, remember me telling you we only have a certain amount left this month? Well, I had a choice to make, rent or electric. So…." Chandler closed his eyes and waited for the yelling to start.  
  
"Rent? You had better have paid rent, please say you did!"  
  
"I did." Chandler breathed, maybe it would not be so bad. The weather was cool as it was late fall. And so the temperature was not hot or cold. And they could take the food over to Joey's and cook over there.   
  
"At least we have a place to stay and will not get thrown out."  
  
They started to suddenly get into the mood and then…..  
  
The thought was not the one that Monica was thinking later that month when the temperature suddenly dropped and she and Chandler to stay warm lay in each other's arms and kept one another warm.  
  
Chandler knew from the way she was looking, that she blamed him for this. He decided to try and get her to forgive him. "Mon, the way I figure it, we can either have Joey move in with us and share rent and the utilities or rob a bank."  
  
"Why did you say rob a bank?"  
  
"Just an idea."  
  
"Oh, which one?"  
  
""First America."  
  
"That place has so much surveillance cameras we would never make it out."  
  
"You are right, it would be easy to walk in and say we are robbing it, but getting out is another thing."  
  
"True. I guess we had better see if Joey wants to move in."  
  
The next day, after telling Joey what would be a good idea of him moving in, he agreed. Chandler started to tell him his plan about getting some money or the laughable idea of robbing a bank.  
  
"I think that is a good idea."  
  
"Joey, don't you see, no one can get out, they will always get caught at the end."  
  
"That is because the police will see their faces and KNOW who the bank robbers are. If they had good costumes on, then they would be able to get out."  
  
"Like what Joey? Ski masks."  
  
"NO clown. And then a person could dress up everybody else in the clown costumes and make up."   
  
"But they would figure it out." Monica tried again.  
  
"Not, if some hostages were released first and they were the bank robbers." Chandler grinned. HE had an idea.   
  
"What?" Monica was too afraid to ask what was going through her boyfriend's mind at the moment.  
  
"Monica would you rob a bank if you could get away with it?"  
  
"You are serious?"  
  
"Extremely."  
  
"Well, we could not stay here."  
  
"We could move to the islands. I mean come on, I get a new start on a career, so could you. You could get your restaurant up and running. Your own restaurant."  
  
"What about me?" Joey asked.   
  
"You could be anything that you want to be. I mean face it Joe. There is no way for you to be an actor now." Chandler then continued. "Think about it, no more snow to drudge through, no more cold days. Just an island paradise. What do you think?"  
  
Joey smiled, "I'm in." HE and Chandler put their fists together in the center of the table above the candle.  
  
"Monica?" Chandler asked looking at his girlfriend.  
  
Monica looked at the both of them before putting her fist on top of Joey's. "I think you both are crazy. But I am in as well."  
  
"Good, now this is what we can do." Chandler started to outline a plan, with Joey excitedly adding his opinions and Monica also added hers. Soon enough she was happy to include what she thought.  
  
*****************  
  
Gary was bored, they had moved him to a desk, when he had gotten shot. He was thinking about early retirement. All he had to do was to go over cases and take care of small things like bank robberies. Nothing else.  
  
*****************  
  
It was around noon.  
  
The bank was crowded with everyone getting their paychecks cashed or lining up to deposit money. A man in flannel and with a beard stood behind a woman with long blond hair and glasses .  
  
About five minutes later, a clown with balloons and a huge stuffed bag walked in. He let the balloons go and block out the camera. ""Alright, everyone KNOWS what a bank robbery is, right?" He then took out his gun, "Well, this is one! Everybody on the floor! NOW!"  
  
The construction worker with a beard started to get sick. "Oh, please spare me! NO one can get that sick, in that amount of time."  
  
"Leave him alone! You creep!" The blond haired woman cried out.  
  
"I think you should stop, seeing that I have the gun."   
  
"Oh, big man with a gun, that has to hide behind make up and a weapon he is more of a man than you will ever be!"  
  
"All right that is it! Lady with a mouth just got everyone to get in the back."  
  
"But…. The bank manager tried."  
  
"NOW!" The clown showed the gun to the man and the guards. Everyone then left to do what was told.  
  
By that time, the NYPD had arrived out front. The telephone rang. "About time." The clown muttered.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Is this the bank robber?"  
  
"Speaking."  
  
"This is detective Gary Schultz. What are your demands?" When would these clowns learn that there was no way for them to escape once they entered?  
  
"Well, first off I want a helicopter to take me to the airport, a bus, a truck a limo and an Oscar Meyer weenie vehicle."  
  
"What?" He heard of some strange requests before, but this one took the cake. "Who is this clown?"  
  
"You heard me. All gassed up and ready to go, on a full tank of gas."  
  
"Fine, but I need a show of good faith."  
  
"I will let one of the hostages go to show that everything is in good faith, then two when all my demands arrive. Does that sound good? I really do not want to hurt anyone. But you see, I have twenty sticks of dynamite with me when I went into the bank. You get the idea."  
  
"You realize we will trace it."  
  
"Hey, Einstein, you can make it at home with a recipe you can get off the web."  
  
"Touché."  
  
"Now get started finding the demands. You have exactly two hours." And I will get the hostage. With that the clown hung up the phone.  
  
Gary shook his head, they had two hours to find what they needed and to get it there. HE then started to make phone calls.   
  
Inside the bank, the clown walked to the back. "Alright one of you gets to leave and I will let you all decide who gets to go." A that the construction worker through up into a bag.   
  
Without any argument everyone pointed, "HIM!" The clown then led him up front.  
  
"What happens if…"  
  
"Just like we rehearsed, my friend."  
  
"See you in a bit. Later."  
  
The construction worker left.  
  
He was then led up to Gary. "Take it easy, Mr.…."  
  
"O'Brien."  
  
"Mr. O'Brien. Could you tell us anything about what is going on in their?"  
  
"He is crazy, he has dynamite, he has a gun." The man then started hyperventilating.  
  
"Ok, take it easy."  
  
"He said he would blow the bank to bits if he was not given what he wants."  
  
"I figured. Any identifying factors? What does he look like?"  
  
"Hair is a mess, big red nose, big floppy feet, make up on his face."  
  
"A clown?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"I knew I should have stayed at the precinct booking hookers."  
  
Ok, go on to the hospital and they will look you over to make sure you are ok." the construction worker was taken to the hospital by car.  
  
Gary then got on a warlike talkie. "To all snipers, aim for the clown. He is the bank robber."  
  
Inside the bank, the clown walked to the back and asked for another volunteer. "I will go the bank manger said."  
  
"Listen here, you wimp of a man. You are not going to make decisions for the rest of us." The woman with the blond hair called out.  
  
"Well, I am the manager."  
  
"that makes you worse than this piece of trash." She pointed to the clown.  
  
"HER!!!!!!!" Everyone screamed out hoping not to make the clown mad.  
  
"Majority rules. Now every one put this on and you may leave in five hours."  
  
An hour and forty five minutes later, Gary called again. "Alright, we got what you wanted. Now as you promised two more hostages.  
  
"Is it all off?"  
  
"Yes it is."  
  
"Then let's go."  
  
Two more hostages ran out. A man with bright red hair and green eyes and a blond haired woman with glasses.   
  
"Alright, tell me what is happening."  
  
"He is horrible, he is mad, he…"  
  
"Oh, will you pipe down, the man is just over compensating from a small penius."  
  
"Alright, uh. I think I have all I need, we will be in touch if we need anything." The two hostages were taken to the hospital and looked over and released.  
  
"Soon after they were released. Gary received another phone call. "We will leave the building in five hours." He then hung up the phone. By that time, they should have their bags and be at the airport on a plane out of there.  
  
As soon as they were done with the hospital they met Joey at their apartment and changed their clothes and washed all the makeup and other stuff of their bodies.  
  
Not to mention got all the money that was taped toothier bodies off. So they had over one million dollars in all. Things were going to work out.  
  
They then packed the rest of their bags. As they were packing, Rachel, Phoebe and Ross came into the apartment.   
  
"I still can not believe that you guys are moving." Phoebe sniffed.  
  
"Yeah and going to the Bahamas. I mean those dream jobs." Rachel was sure jealous. A person could tell, by the way she was standing there.  
  
Ross was skeptical. "They sound too good to be true."  
  
"Ross, will you stop being so pee in your glass I mean our friends are leaving. And for a better life." Phoebe was evidently happy for them.  
  
Rachel hugged Monica , Chandler and Joey. As did Phoebe. Ross finally did the same thing. Then they soon left for the airport. By that time, it had been three hours and there was still two to go.  
  
Once they arrived at the airport, they said some more of their good-byes and then boarded the plane.   
  
Two hours later, they were in the air and soon would be landing. The three friends were sitting beside each other and drinking some champagne to celebrate.   
  
Back in New York, the doors to the bank opened and twenty clowns came running out. "DON'T SHOOT! DON'T SHOOT! HOLD YOUR FIRE!"  
  
By the time it was all figured out, Gary asked about the hostages that were the first to be let go. "Two? There were three!"  
  
"No, there were two. A blond feminist and a construction worker that kept getting sick."  
  
"What about the redhead?"  
  
"What red head?"  
  
"The one with the blond." Then it dawned on Gary, he called up the hospital and asked a sew questions. And learned that they had indeed gotten away with it.  
  
Bahamas  
  
Chandler and Monica were dancing closely together and Joey was busy putting on his charm to the ladies. Chandler nudged Monica's neck which caused her to moan.  
  
"Chandler I got something to tell you. Remember when you first came up with the plan? And the night activities that we enjoyed after, well I just found out, I am pregnant."  
  
Chandler just grinned and dipped his girlfriend. Or his fiancé. He had asked her to marry him a few hours ago once they were on the beach alone together.  
  
Nine months later  
  
Phoebe had gotten a latter from Monica init was the cute photo of a baby boy. And a picture of her restaurant and a picture of a sea plane that belonged to Chandler and Joey. She frowned at that. Where in the world did they come up with the money to afford that?   
  
On the news the TV talked about the bank robbery that had happened nine months earlier. Phoebe put her hand over her mouth and gasped.  
  
********************  
  
That is it folks, I am not going to continue this fic. But if someone wants to, have at it. 


End file.
